Write what you know

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Who hasn’t received this sage advice?
What a fantastic way to make a new author feel comfortable writing a story. So in the interests of writing my first thriller I decided I needed to experience a few things.
In any thriller you have to have a hero. So my first stop was Man-Ville. For those unaware what Man-Ville is, basically it is a chain store catering to people who look like they just stepped in from the great outdoors and shave to leave a days worth of stubble. At this store I picked up several necessary supplies: boots, because no man wears anything but; pants that can actually hold a wallet, a pristine condition, SharpenedKnife brand pocket knife and a set of keys that would undoubtedly unlock every door ever made; and a button up shirt that can have the sleeves rolled up. Clothes maketh the man, so now I was a hero. Of course I could have waited to be rescued from a natural disaster and have the media bestow the title of hero upon me for surviving, but I felt it was easier to shop.
With my new attire I am now ready to go to a bar. It is very important to know the ins and outs of every single bar, pub, drinking spot and speak-easy around the area in which your novel is set. It is also a very good chance to pick up some valuable research in one of the key aspects of any thriller, physical violence. I wanted to start out easy and only take on two guys in a pub brawl before working myself up to the impossible odds scenarios expected in fiction.
The next part of my experience necessary for thriller writing came very quickly. Pain in the form of broken bones, bruising and a nasty knife wound were all particularly good experiences. Now when my hero gets hurt I can actually tell that tale from first hand experience. I tried to get someone to shoot me as well, but apparently most people seem more content kicking you repeatedly whilst you are laying unconscious on the ground.
The next step is to be in a car chase, preferably at ridiculous speeds whilst being pursued by ‘bad guys’. Unfortunately I don’t know any people likely to chase me, short of stealing a police car and taunting some traffic police I can’t see a genuine chase ensuing. So I decided to do some high speed driving along the city streets in my Toyota Prius. I really enjoyed taking corners as quickly as possible, driving through intersections with narrow misses all around, and out running an elderly gentleman on his bike.
Now my thriller is partly set in a neighboring galaxy where my hero’s knowledge and skills of current society proves invaluable in a far more advanced alien culture. Obviously space travel is inordinately expensive and time consuming for a first time author, this leaves very few options to suitably experience alien cultures. So in order for me to fully appreciate space adventures, other worlds and live amongst an alien culture, I moved to Siberia. This was a great break from sunny Australia. Siberia also proved a suitable chance for me to tread in the footsteps, or thrust in the manner, of Captain Kirk. Any space hero is required to emulate the ultimate in masculine space heroes. Admittedly Siberian women are not green, more a pale white to light blue.
So now I’m ready to write what I know. Much better idea than doing research.

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