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At the end of a day of writing you don’t feel like stabbing yourself in the eye with a pencil.
Writing can be done at any time, rather than nine till five, which is much better suited to sleeping.
Dressing for work is optional. And I mean optional.
Work shoes don’t have to have a safety rating or glossy shine, they only have to be wool lined and comfy.
If you spend all of the money your boss gives you and fail to complete your job on time, nobody is really that surprised.
All of that wasted time on the internet is “research”.
Drinking on the job is mandatory rather than discouraged.
Emailing, Facebooking, tweeting and blogging are important networking, not procrastination.
Shaving is no longer a daily chore, it is a sign you are going out in public for a change.
Work colleagues are people you only see at festivals, or chat to on Facebook when you can’t be bothered working.
Paperwork? What paperwork?
The arrival of the mail is a daily highlight, rather than something you check for as you arrive home.