I think any writer could confirm the truth of this.
#1: Or it can make you sound pretentious.
#2: Neighbours will think you’re an antisocial serial killer.
#3: Still conducting that study.
#4: Books have broken hearts. They could kill.
#5: Books don’t tend to fossilise well. No idea if dinosaurs read.
From Tom Gauld’s new postcard book ‘The Snooty Bookshop’. Order links here.